Review: The Luckiest Girl Alive!

Luckiest Girl AliveLuckiest Girl Alive by Jessica Knoll
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Luckiest Girl Alive

By Jessica Knoll

Who needs a beach/porch read? You do. This fact-paced, snappy novel packs a really satisfying (though it will make you squirm) ending. For a long time, I had wondered, what in the world is an ‘unreliable narrator’ and who would use one? And what kind of an author would pen a novel with the lead actor cast as a nasty, jaded human. Author Jessica Knoll does both and boy is this a kicker.
Give this opening a read:
“I inspected the knife in my hand….my fiancé. That word didn’t bother me as much as the other one that came after it. Husband. That word laced the corset tighter, crushing organs, sending panic into my throat with the bright beat of a distress signal…Slip the forged nickel and stainless-steel blade soundlessly into his stomach.”
I know. And believe me, the tension level in the tale is tight as a drum. One thing that I will share with you is that at the very end of the book, Knoll reveals one really horrible part of her book is autobiographical and had I known that from the start, I would have given TifAni FaNelli a little wriggle room. She is the lead in this train-wreck and boy does she have an opinion. About everything.
Twenty-eight-year-old Ani (alias TifAni) is rocking what she desperately wants you to believe is the most incredible life EVER! Living in New York, working for a high-brow women’s magazine, wearing the best of the best designer this and that and her body, a size zero with dangerous curves. Ani is the epitome of young female perfection in accordance with the super-hyped world of high-fashion. In other words, this dynamite babe is one hot tamale. Only that way inside is a fourteen-year-old girl who never fit in. Never. But dang, she did her best to try. And they did their worst in the process.
Through flash-backs we are led down the rocky road of what created this desperate woman/girl to reach for something we are constantly and ferociously led to believe is the ultimate goal. Looks, body and the perfect man will make your life incredibly amazingly perfect. Right?
Except, it doesn’t.
There are not one, but two defining moments that spin TifAni’s life literally out of control. They are both shocking in their own right and together create an amazing backdrop to how someone can be motivated to do some pretty unbelievable things in order to create an illusion of not only fitting in, but making it.
The fascination of the structure as well as how in the world is this all going to end create a pulse that pulls you in and doesn’t let go. The snide and snarky internal dialog of Ani adds to this quirky character and ultimately her barely discernable tender insides allow you to nearly like her.
Nearly.
There are many life lessons Ani draws from and one that sticks with me is how, no matter the odds, the good guys just never completely win. But honestly, it’s not the winning that counts, it’s the journey and boy is this one a doo
• Great for book clubs

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Review: FACTFULLNESS

Factfulness: Ten Reasons We're Wrong About the World – and Why Things Are Better Than You ThinkFactfulness: Ten Reasons We’re Wrong About the World – and Why Things Are Better Than You Think by Hans Rosling
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

FACTFULLNESS
Ten Reasons We’re Wrong About the World—and Why Things Are Better Than You Think
By Hans Rosling

This book will give you something we as a nation, no, wait a second, make that the world really needs right now.
Facts.
Things are not as bad as you may think they are especially when you have the facts. Want to test yourself about your basic knowledge of the world? Try these three questions, then check your answers at the bottom. No peeking.
1. In all low-income countries across the world today, how many girls finish primary school?
A: 20 percent
B: 40 percent
C: 60 percent
2. Where does the majority of the world population live?
A: Low-income countries
B: Middle-income countries
C: High-income countries
3. In the last 20 years, the proportion of the world population living in extreme poverty has…
A: Almost doubled
B: Remained more or less the same
C: Almost halved
Author Hans Rosling, a renowned Swedish doctor, researcher and lecturer in global health, created this book for all of us who have been getting the present state of the world totally wrong. It’s not your fault, entirely, but it is up to you to get your facts straight and realize that overall, we’re on the right track. Why does your blood pressure surge every time you tap through the news or talk to your co-worker? Author Rosling calls it the overdramatic worldview which is usually stressful as well as misleading. Why? The main reason the media does this so well is very simple; it keeps you watching, clicking, tweeting and wanting more of the same. It’s time for something new. Why have we gotten stuck in this mind-numbing treadmill? Rosling has a simple theory.
He believes we are intrinsically interested in gossip and dramatic stories. Admit it, we are. Our quick-thinking brains crave human drama in all its myriad of foibles, which he refers to as our dramatic instinct. This is what causes misconceptions that directly influence an overdramatic worldview. He feels we need to control our appetite for the dramatic because it prevents us from seeing the world as it is and leads us terribly astray.
One of the biggest influences our media uses to keep us clicking back for more is—fear.
“When we are afraid, we do not see clearly. Critical thinking is always difficult, but it’s almost impossible when we are scared. There’s no room for facts when our minds are occupied by fear.”
This simple fact is not only easy to discern by reading any news headline but is the single most powerful driving force constantly moving us further and further away from the facts. What other facts might you learn from Rosling that will alleviate your daily self-induced dose of unproductive chain-and-ball stress?
Consider these.
Facts (exact numbers see link) of bad things decreasing in the world: oil spills, children dying, deaths from disasters, hunger. Facts of good things increasing: women’s right to vote, science, girls in school, literacy, child cancer survival.
“…a fact-based worldview is more useful for navigating life…and probably more important: a fact-based worldview is more comfortable. It creates less stress and hopelessness than the dramatic worldview, simply because the dramatic one is so negative and terrifying. When we have a fact-based worldview, we can see that the world is not as bad as it seems—and we can see what we have to do to keep making it better.”
Rosling is no Pollyanna, however. In a recent essay in the Guardian, he addresses the obvious challenge to his reasoning… “My guess is you feel that me saying that the world is getting better is like me telling you that everything is fine, and that feels ridiculous. I agree. Everything is not fine. We should still be very concerned. As long as there are plane crashes, preventable child deaths, endangered species, climate change sceptics, male chauvinists, crazy dictators, toxic waste, journalists in prison, and girls not getting an education, we cannot relax. But it is just as ridiculous to look away from the progress that has been made. The consequent loss of hope can be devastating. When people wrongly believe that nothing is improving, they may lose confidence in measures that actually work.”
The world is not as bad or lost or scary or messed up or un-fixable as we tend to believe. Know the facts and focus on what is important.
You.

· Know the facts
· Want more? gapminder dot org
· Correct answers: 1: C, 2: B, 3 C

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Review: The Opposite of Hate

The Opposite of Hate: A Field Guide to Repairing Our HumanityThe Opposite of Hate: A Field Guide to Repairing Our Humanity by Sally Kohn
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The Opposite of Hate
A Field Guide to Repairing Our Humanity
By Sally Kohn

Reviewed by Jay Gilbertson

We all hate. All of us. That means me, and unfortunately it also includes you. We are not born to do this; to judge and then hate others. We are taught to hate by the world around us. And by the way, hate is a four-letter word, worlds away from another four-letter word: love.
Author Kohn first came to my attention when her Ted Talk landed in my in-box. If you’re not familiar with Ted Talks, you should be. Hate has always been a fascination to me, how bullies can develop from even the nicest seeming individuals and what is the motivating factor that allows us to hate others? How this powerful emotion can blind us into choosing sides and spewing hate.
It has to stop.
“In different ways and to different degrees, consciously or unconsciously, all of us, in one way or another, sometimes treat other individuals and entire groups of human beings as though they are fundamentally less deserving than we are.”
Though I do feel Kohn went slightly off the rails sharing examples in the book and over-explained several scientific research projects on the subject, her message is none-the-less important and very timely. I should caution you, as in the following quote, Kohn can be very harsh in her observations of our country’s past, but don’t let that stop you from hearing her larger message.
“The United States was founded on hate—the hatred that justified colonial annihilation of American Indians and that perpetuated the enslavement of Africans. Hate divided the country during the Civil War and, a century later, spawned protest movements and backlash movements, with activists vying over issues of justice and human rights. And Americans are not alone in this legacy…”
To understand how society can justify hate is not that difficult. If you don’t have the capacity to imagine yourself as black, Muslim, gay or anything you are not, you can justify hate. Everyone has done this to some degree. We all think we have it worse, which gives us permission to marginalize others by bullying, disregarding completely or simply not seeing our similarities. You name it, we find a reason and then we slather on the hate. The solution to changing this behavior of us vs. them is pretty simple. It’s there in front of you and it’s up to each and every one of us.
“We need to meet the people we hate and learn their stories, which means supporting institutions and policies that foster connection-spaces, and also creating our own. Getting outside ourselves, breaking through the physical and mental walls of our own narratives and viewpoints.”
The bottom line; it’s nearly impossible to hate anyone up close, in person, face-to-face.
“What I’ve learned is that all hate is premised on a mind-set of otherizing. The sanctimonious pedestal of superiority on which we all put ourselves while we systematically dehumanize others is the essential root of hate. In big and small ways, consciously and unconsciously, we constantly filter the world around us through the lens of our explicit and implicit biases. This abets rationalization and looking the other way about widespread injustices, such as dismissing entire communities that don’t have access to health care, of entire nations locked in civil war because they fall outside the sphere of our moral concern.”
There is a crisis of hate surging through the US and the world and we need to see it. Leo Tolstoy wrote, “Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”
Consider this. You don’t have to agree with everyone, or give up your particular beliefs or views, you don’t even have to like everyone. Actually, the opposite of hate is so much easier to do and be and teach and experience and share. We really only have to keep this one thing in mind; we are all basically connected and equal as human beings.
The opposite of hate is—connection.

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Do YOU Know What A Sandbakkel Is?

At every meal my dad says the Norwegian Table Prayer. Then he always follows it by saying, “Grab a root and growl.” I have always simply assumed that is pretty much part of the prayer too. At least if you want to eat at his table, it is.

 

Traditions.

 

Another one that has been going on since I can remember is the creation of Sandbakkels every Christmas season. Using the same recipe (that mom has tweaked) my dad’s mom’s mom used and with my dad mentioning before we sit down at the card table to ‘pinch’ the dough into tins,

 

“No pinchy, no eaty!”

 

Really. Every. Single. Year.

 

Once the little gems are in the oven and we’re working on pan two or three, I wonder why in the world I do this. It’s a lot of work and you have to sit still and then, once my dad is all warmed up and we’re there, his audience, I realize the why part.

 

Being together.

 

So, this coming year I will once again gather at my folks, my mom will have made the dough, adding the secret ingredient at the last moment and then off we’ll pinch and my dad will begin sharing the same stories I’ve heard a hundred times and I’ll look up and smile…

 

By the way, a Sandbakkel is a Norwegian cookie and no, we don’t fill them with anything. These are the tins we pinch them into.

 

(walnut-size blob of dough and pinch and pinch and pinch)

November and NO Snow—Nice…

sunflowers-on-the-porch

 

This is our front door and those awesome sunflowers we grew from seed. Even at my age I still feel there’s a touch of magic in growing things. It just never ceases to amaze me that you can grow something so darn beautiful from a little seed that fits in your palm.

 

Love the mystery of it.

 

Could be why I enjoy the art and freedom and yes, mystery of writing. When the words are flying into my head and zipping through my fingers and onto the laptop-page, well trust me, I feel something. Not a believer in having a muse or wearing a lucky hat or all that other stuff so many authors seem to lean on. I simply read a poem to warm up, or gaze at a bouquet of wild flowers or sneak a look out my window, and if things are unfolding with my story in all the right ways (or wrong) off I zoom!

 

If the words are not lined up and ready to move onto the page, I get up and do something else. If I force the work—that’s exactly how it will read.

 

So, if inspiration doesn’t come into your current project—

 

Know that in the spring the seeds will grow again and somewhere—the sun is always shining.